Monday, August 20, 2012

App Programmers or Crap Programmers?

The more I use these so-called programs or Apps for mobile devices I'm beginning to realize that these people claiming to be programmers cranking out this crap for $0.99  don't know their collective programming asses from a hole in the ground.

OK, forgive me for leaving the Wifi and 3G off when I start your program. Is that any reason to just exit the fucking APP without so much as an error like "Cannot connect to server, please check that Wifi is enabled?".

Then there's my favorite, the game apps that remember their last state so when you close and reopen the fucker it's still fucking STUCK where it was when you got hosed and had to close it in the first fucking place! One was so goddamn obnoxious with bad error handling that I had to use Task Killer to dump it's ass just to get it to start over. I was real close to uninstalling the fucking thing if it didn't start over but thankfully Task Killer did the trick.

Even worse IMO are the ones that although they appear to stay in memory, or at least some notification component does to tell you when someone has taken their turn in the game, will make you sit and wait with your dick in your hand every time while it revalidates your login or something as stupid. I really can't tell what it's doing but it does it every fucking time, while most others don't, and takes forever.

Piles of poorly designed sloppy shoddy shit being cranked out as quickly and cheaply as possible to go into Google Play, or as I like to call it "THE DOLLAR STORE".

Maybe Google should take a little responsibility here and create a bug reporting system attached to Google Play and when enough people start bitching about some shitty program they suspend it from Google Play until the author fixes that shit.

That's right, I'm suggesting vigilante bug reporting and mandated bug fixes based on reports from an angry mob of users. If the app writers don't want to fix their fucking apps then they simply drop from the app store and their little river of $0.99 kachings dries up and blows away. Too fucking bad.
 
I know about 10 games I'd report in a flash, and we're not talking the free versions either as I can tolerate bugs when that shit's free but make me part with a whole whopping $0.99 and that shit better work right!




Why Bother WIth Even Having Beer Taps?

Went out for dinner tonight and I got all excited when I saw the place actually had beer taps.

Then, with much dismay, I quickly realize they're the same beers on both ends of the bar, just 2 beers which were Bud and Sam Adams, ugh.  So I suffered through a Sam Adams and barely gagged the last of it down.

Sam Adams is just OK, probably better than Sierra Fucking Nevada, but neither are exactly my cup of about-to-be-recycled-as-pee.

I'm all about the IPA these days and all the finest places serve it, like Big Daddy, Double Daddy, Racers, etc. OMFG! I love Double Daddy, it's double the hops and malt of Big Daddy and will knock you right out of your fucking socks with it's hoppy IPA goodness. Try Big Daddy, you'll be very hoppy if you do. :)

Anyway, I'm bummed, dinner was fine but the beer was a bust so I stopped at one.

Yeah, yeah, I know they had all sorts of good shit in bottles and cans but I can do bottles and cans at home. I don't go out to get the same pedestrian experience sold at the local grocery store when I go out for dinner, I go out for something better that I can't get at home and FUCKING BUD AND SAM ADAMS ON TAP AIN'T IT!

[/rant]