Sunday, August 24, 2008

Woman Weather Channel

During a discussion with a few of my male friends today it became obvious that some of us could benefit from such an online service.

You could have a widget, perhaps a Google Gadget even, sitting on your desktop that declares your woman's current menstrual state such as:

Today: Slightly Spotty
Then you could click on the widget and look at the 5 day forecast and see what's in store for the week:
Mon: Spotty
Tue: Heavy Flow
Wed: Flow
Thu: Spotty
Fri: Clear
Obviously the paid version I'm tentatively calling "Wife Alert" could also send potentially life saving text messages to your cell phone at appropriate times.

It's 6am on that fateful morning when the text message alarm chirps:
"PMS EMERGENCY! THIS IS A HEAVY FLOW DAY! FORGET THE CHILDREN, GET OUT NOW AND SAVE YOURSELF BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!"
Perhaps even an advance warning system with even more important information such as converging events that could spell disaster if you fuck up.
"WARNING - HEAVY FLOW AND BIRTHDAY BOTH COMING IN 3 DAYS. DON'T FORGET FLOWERS, PRESENTS AND PARTY AS YOUR LIFE COULD DEPEND ON IT!"
Considering how much physical and mental abuse this could potentially save men, it's even possible your health insurance company would pick up the tab to "Wife Alert" as a standard health benefit.

Just like how the weather channel allows you to look up the weather of other locations around the world, the Woman Weather Channel would allow you to look up celebrities online.

Could you imagine tuning in to watch The View when you knew two of the hosts were going to have a bad day at the same time?

The Woman Weather Channel could also be an indispensable resource for anyone in business or politics that could simply avoid any bosses, colleagues or co-workers known to be having a "bad day" until her weather report showed all clear.

The possibilities are endless so tune into the Woman Weather Channel today and all you husbands subscribe to "Wife Alert" as it could be your life it saves!